How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
by Patricia Love
from Broadway
Men are right. The “relationship talk” does not help. Dr. Patricia Love’s and
Dr. Steven Stosny’s How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
reveals the stunning truth about marital happiness:
Love is not about better communication.
It's about connection.
You'll never get a closer relationship
with your man by talking to him like you
talk to one of your girlfriends.
Male emotions are like women's sexuality:
you can't be too direct too quickly.
There are four ways to connect with a man:touch, activity, sex, routines.
Men want closer marriages just as much as women do,but not if they has to act like a woman.
Talking makes women move closer;
it makes men move away.
The secret of the silent male is this:
his wife supplies the meaning in his life.
The stunning truth about love is that talking doesn’t help.
Have you ever had this conversation with your spouse?
Wife: “Honey, we need to talk about us.”
Husband: “Do we have to?”
Drs. Patricia Love and Steven Stosny have studied this all-too-familiar dynamic between men and women and have reached a truly shocking conclusion. Even with the best of intentions, talking about your relationship doesn’t bring you together, and it will eventually drive you apart.
The reason for this is that underneath most couples’ fights, there is a biological difference at work. A woman’s vulnerability to fear and anxiety makes her draw closer, while a man’s subtle sensitivity to shame makes him pull away in response. This is why so many married couples fall into the archetypal roles of nagging wife/stonewalling husband, and why improving a marriage can’t happen through words.
How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It teaches couples how to get closer in ways that don’t require “trying to turn a man into a woman.” Rich in stories of couples who have turned their marriages around, and full of practical advice about the behaviors that make and break marriages, this essential guide will help couples find love beyond words.
The Layguide: How to Seduce Women More Beautiful Than You Ever Dreamed Possible No Matter What You Look Like or How Much You Make
by Tony Clink
from Citadel
Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence
by Esther Perel
from Harper Paperbacks
One of the world's most respected voices on erotic intelligence, Esther Perel offers a bold, provocative new take on intimacy and sex. Mating in Captivity invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.
Drawing on more than twenty years of experience as a couples therapist, Perel examines the complexities of sustaining desire. Through case studies and lively discussion, Perel demonstrates how more exciting, playful, and even poetic sex is possible in long-term relationships. Wise, witty, and as revelatory as it is straightforward, Mating in Captivity is a sensational book that will transform the way you live and love.
In a Different Voice: Psychological Theory and Women's Development
by Carol Gilligan
from Harvard University Press
This is the little book that started a revolution. First published almost twenty years ago, it made women's voices heard, in their own right and with their own integrity, for virtually the first time in social scientific theorizing about women. Its impact was immediate and continues to this day, in the academic world and beyond. Translated into sixteen languages, with more than three-quarters of a million copies sold around the world. In a Different Voice has inspired new research, new educational initiatives, and political debate-and helped many women and men to see themselves and each other in a different light.
Carol Gilligan believes that psychology has persistently and systematically misunderstood women--their motives, their moral commitments, the course of their psychological growth, and their special view of what is important in life. Here she sets out to correct psychology's misperceptions and refocus its view of female personality. The result is truly a tour de force, which may well reshape much of what psychology now has to say about female experience.
Do Gentlemen Really Prefer Blondes?: Bodies, Behavior, and Brains--The Science Behind Sex, Love, and Attraction
by Jena Pincott
from Delacorte Press
How long does it take to decide if a person is hot?
Is your lover more likely to get you pregnant than your husband?
Can men tell when a woman is fertile?
If you’ve ever wondered how scientists measure love—or whether men really prefer blondes over brunettes—this smart, sexy book provides real answers to these and many other questions about our most baffling dating and mating behaviors. Based on the latest research in biology, evolutionary psychology, neuroscience, and cognitive science, Do Gentlemen Really Prefer Blondes? dares to explain the science behind sex—and opens a fascinating window on the intriguing phenomenon of love and attraction.
Covering the areas of bodies, brains, and behavior, this eye-opening guide reveals the genetic, hormonal, and psychological secrets behind what makes us tick sexually. For example, do you know why a man’s body chemistry and behavior change when he’s in a committed relationship? And why, when he becomes a daddy, his testosterone level seems to plummet? And did you know…
• When a couple first fall in love, their brains are indistinguishable from those of the clinically insane
• You can tell a lot about a person’s sexual chemistry just by looking at his or her hands
• Your genes influence whose body odors you prefer
• Being around breast-feeding women may increase a woman's sex drive
Viewed through the lens of science and instinct, your love life might be seen in a completely different way. Do Gentlemen Really Prefer Blondes? provides both an in-depth exploration into our sexual psyches—and fresh advice for men and women who want to discover the secrets of successful relationships.
Perfect Love, Imperfect Relationships: Healing the Wound of the Heart
by John Welwood
from Trumpeter
While most of us have moments of loving freely and openly, it is often hard to sustain this where it matters most—in our intimate relationships. Why, if love is so great and powerful, are human relationships so challenging and difficult? If love is the source of happiness and joy, why is it so hard to open to it fully and let it govern our lives? In this book, John Welwood addresses these questions and shows us how to overcome the most fundamental obstacle that keeps us from experiencing love's full flowering in our lives. Perfect Love, Imperfect Relationships begins by showing how all our relational problems arise out of a universal, core wounding around love that affects not only our personal relationships but the quality of life in our world as a whole. This wounding shows up as a pervasive mood of unlove—a deep sense that we are not intrinsically lovable just as we are. And this shuts down our capacity to trust, so that even though we may hunger for love, we have difficulty opening to it and letting it circulate freely through us. This book takes the reader on a powerful journey of healing and transformation that involves learning to embrace our humanness and appreciate the imperfections of our relationships as trail-markers along the path to great love. It sets forth a process for releasing deep-seated grievances we hold against others for not loving us better and against ourselves for not being better loved. And it shows how our longing to be loved can magnetize the great love that will free us from looking to others to find ourselves. Written with penetrating realism and a fresh, lyrical style that honors the subtlety and richness of our relationship to love itself, this revolutionary book offers profound and practical guidance for healing our lives as well as our embattled world.
A workshop based on this book is also available in audio. For more information, click here.Â
The Heart of Tantric Sex: A Unique Guide to Love and Sexual Fulfillment
by Diana Richardson
from O Books
This book can transform your experience into a sensual, loving and fulfilling one.
Size Matters: The Hard Facts About Male Sexuality That Every Woman Should Know
by Harry M.D. Fisch
from Three Rivers Press
A man’s anatomy is a lot easier to understand than his mind, and knowing what’s going on down there is just as important to a happy relationship as figuring out the deeper meaning of his every word. You can analyze your relationship with your girlfriends, but who can you turn to with the more . . . sensitive questions? In Size Matters, Dr. Harry Fisch, an expert on the male reproductive system, and writer Kara Baskin team up to introduce you, metaphorically speaking, to the penis.
Clearing up mysteries about male anatomy, orgasm, masturbation, STDs, testosterone, impotence, sexual response, and much more, Size Matters is the first women’s user manual for male sexuality—a guidebook that will answer all your questions and lead you to a better sex life. For example:
Can masturbation have any effect on sex? Can he do it too much . . . or too little?
He always orgasms before me . . . is there any way to slow him down?
Do grown men still have wet dreams?
Can his weight affect our sex life?
Size Matters is a fun, prescriptive, easy-to-understand troubleshooting guide for women who have questions about male sexuality or who want to have better sex. You might not always understand what’s going on in his mind, but now you can know what’s going on in his pants.
Becoming Orgasmic: A Sexual and Personal Growth Program for Women
by Julia Heiman
from Fireside
Are you shy or self-conscious when it comes to sex? Do you want to learn how to enhance the pleasure you derive from sex? The revised and expanded edition of Becoming Orgasmic provides a program designed to help anyone overcome the myriad obstacles to complete sexual satisfaction.
Whether married or single, young or old, the program presented in these pages will help you feel comfortable with yourself and your ideas about sex and enable you to grow as a person. Becoming Orgasmic will help you:
• Evaluate your sexual history and put it in perspectiveA personal and sensitively written book that is also informative, Becoming Orgasmic is designed to make you feel good about your sexuality and yourself.• Explore your body through touch
• Understand the effects of pregnancy, menstruation, and menopause on sexual desire and response
• Be comfortable with your body and yourself as a woman
• Share self-discovery with your partner
• Find techniques to try if something turns you off
• Overcome the fear of orgasm
• Learn how to bring yourself to orgasm
• Practice safe sex in today's world -- precautionary measures, social expectations, personal values, and choosing a partner in the age of AIDS
The Fine Art Of Erotic Talk: How To Entice, Excite, And Enchant Your Lover With Words
by Bonnie Gabriel
from Bantam
Explore the Passionate Power of Words
A whispered term of endearment, a flirtatious phrase, a secret suggestion, a cry of passion--words can be the most intimate gift that lovers share. This guide to their sensual power invites us to explore the erotic potential in verbal communication, as sexuality counselor and seminar leader Bonnie Gabriel shows how words can arouse desire, reveal and fulfill fantasies, and infuse lovemaking with romance and fire.
Based on Gabriel's popular workshops, this frankly provocative and warmly encouraging book is designed for both singles and couples: to help singles navigate the the shoals of attraction, budding intimacy, and safe sex; and to inspire couples to chrage longtime romances with new creative expressions of love and ardor through explicit examples, sample fantasy scripts, "naughty" games, and techniques for nurturing and sexual healing. And for those who feel too shy or fearful to express passions and yearnings, Gabriel offers guidance, support, and inspiration to help them give full voice to their desires.
Discover how words can deepen intimacy, heighten sensuality, intensify eroticism, and fulfill your every fantasy when you master The Fine Art of Erotic Talk.
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