The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate
by Gary Chapman
from Northfield Publishing
Unhappiness in marriage often has a simple root cause: we speak different love languages, believes Dr. Gary Chapman. While working as a marriage counselor for more than 30 years, he identified five love languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. In a friendly, often humorous style, he unpacks each one. Some husbands or wives may crave focused attention; another needs regular praise. Gifts are highly important to one spouse, while another sees fixing a leaky faucet, ironing a shirt, or cooking a meal as filling their "love tank." Some partners might find physical touch makes them feel valued: holding hands, giving back rubs, and sexual contact. Chapman illustrates each love language with real-life examples from his counseling practice.
How do you discover your spouse’s – and your own – love language? Chapman’s short questionnaires are one of several ways to find out. Throughout the book, he also includes application questions that can be answered more extensively in the beautifully detailed companion leather journal (an exclusive Amazon.com set). Each section of the journal corresponds with a chapter from the book, offering opportunities for deeper reflection on your marriage.
Although some readers may find choosing to love a spouse that they no longer even like –hoping the feelings of affection will follow later– a difficult concept to swallow, Chapman promises that the results will be worth the effort. "Love is a choice," says Chapman. "And either partner can start the process today." --Cindy Crosby. This text refers to the Amazon.com Exclusive Journal & Paperback Book Set.
Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs
by Emerson Eggerichs
from Thomas Nelson
Based upon Ephesians 5:33 and extensive biblical and psychological research, Dr. Emerson Eggerichs reveals the power of unconditional love and unconditional respect and how husbands and wives can reap the benefits of marriage that God intended.
The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists
by Neil Strauss
from William Morrow
Are you just another AFC ("average frustrated chump") trying to meet an HB ("hot babe")? How would you like to "full-close" with a Penthouse Pet of the Year? The answers, my friend, are in Neil Strauss's entertaining book The Game. Strauss was a self-described chick repellant--complete with large, bumpy nose, small, beady eyes, glasses, balding head, and, worst of all, painful shyness around women. He felt like "half a man." That is, until a book editor asked him to investigate the community of pickup artists. Strauss's life was transformed. He spent two years bedding some fine chiquitas and studying with some of the North America's most suave gents--including the best of them all, the God of the pickup "community," a man named Mystery.
Mystery is an aspiring Toronto magician who charges $2,250 for a weekend pickup workshop. He is not much to look at: a cross between a vampire and a computer geek. But by using high-powered marketing techniques he's turned seduction into an effortless craft--even inventing his own vocabulary. His technique sounds like a car salesman's tip sheet: his main rule is FMAC--find, meet, attract, close. He employs the "three-second rule"--always approach a woman within three seconds of first seeing her in order to avoid getting shy. Other tricks: Intrigue a beautiful woman by pretending to be unaffected by her charm; also, never hit on a woman right away. Start with a disarming, innocent remark, like "Do you think magic spells work?" or "Oh my god, did you see those two girls fighting outside?" And finally, the most important characteristic of the pickup artist--smile.
After two years, Strauss ends up becoming almost as successful as Mystery, but he comes to an important realization. His techniques were actually off-putting to the woman he ended up falling in love with. And they never prepared him for actually having a relationship. After a while, he ran out of one-liners and had to have a real conversation. Still, The Game is a great read that may help some AFCs come out of their shells. --Alex Roslin
Hidden somewhere, in nearly every major city in the world, is an underground seduction lair. And in these lairs, men trade the most devastatingly effective techniques ever invented to charm women. This is not fiction. These men really exist. They live together in houses known as Projects. And Neil Strauss, the bestselling author, spent two years living among them, using the pseudonym Style to protect his real-life identity. The result is one of the most explosive and controversial books of the year -- guaranteed to change the lives of men and transform the way women understand the opposite sex forever.
On his journey from AFC (average frustrated chump) to PUA (pick-up artist) to PUG (pick-up guru), Strauss not only shares scores of original seduction techniques but also has unforgettable encounters with the likes of Tom Cruise, Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Heidi Fleiss, and Courtney Love. And then things really start to get strange -- and passions lead to betrayals lead to violence. The Game is the story of one man's transformation from frog to prince -- to prisoner in the most unforgettable book of the year.
Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples, 20th Anniversary Edition
from Holt Paperbacks
When Harville Hendrix writes about relationships, he discusses them not just as an educator and a therapist, but as a man who has himself been through a failed marriage. Hendrix felt the sting of his divorce intensely because he believed it signaled not only his failure as a husband but also his failure as a couples counselor. Investigating why his marriage dissolved led him to start looking into the psychology of love. Marriage, he ultimately discovered, is the "practice of becoming passionate friends."
As a result of his research, Hendrix created a therapy he calls Imago Relationship Therapy. In it, he combines what he's learned in a number of disciplines, including the behavioral sciences, depth psychology, cognitive therapy, and Gestalt therapy, to name just a few. He expounds upon this approach in Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples. His purpose in writing the book, he says, is "to share with you what I have learned about the psychology of love relationships, and to help you transform your relationship into a lasting source of love and companionship."
Divided into three sections, the book covers "The Unconscious Marriage," which details a marriage in which the remaining desires and behavior of childhood interfere with the current relationship; "The Conscious Marriage," which shows a marriage that fulfils those childhood needs in a positive manner; and a 10-week "course in relationship therapy, " which gives detailed exercises for you and your partner to follow in order to learn how to "replace confrontation and criticism ... with a healing process of mutual growth and support." The text is occasionally dry and technical; however, the information provided is valuable, the case studies are interesting, and the exercises are revealing and helpful. By utilizing his program, Hendrix hopes you too will be able to solve your marital difficulties without the expense of a therapist. --Jenny Brown
REVISED AND WITH A NEW FOREWORD
ARE YOU GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT?
Originally published in 1988, Getting the Love You Want has helped millions of couples attain more loving, supportive, and deeply satisfying relationships. The 20th anniversary edition contains extensive revisions to this groundbreaking book, with a new chapter, new exercises, and a foreword detailing Dr. Hendrix’s updated philosophy for eliminating all negativity from couples’ daily interactions, allowing readers of the 2008 edition to benefit from his ongoing discoveries during his last two decades of work.
Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., in partnership with his wife, Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD., originated Imago Relationship Therapy, a unique healing process for couples, prospective couples, and parents. Together they have more than thirty years’ experience as educators and therapists and their work has been translated into more than 50 languages, with Imago practiced by two thousand therapists worldwide. Harville and Helen have six children and live in New York and New Mexico.
Getting the Love You Want describes the three stages of intimate relationships, provides illustrative case studies and gives helpful recommendations to overcome the obstacles in those stages to create a stronger bond between couples. First, he chronicles the stages of most relationships-attraction, romantic love and the power struggle-and suggests ways for partners to identify the conflicts associated with each of them. Then, he explores methods for achieving a "Conscious Marriage," where the early phases of romance are rekindled and confrontation is slowly replaced by growth and support. Finally, Dr. Hendrix incorporates these ideas into a unique therapeutic course, offering a series of proven exercises that lead to insight, resolution and revitalization. Step by step, he describes how to communicate with greater accuracy and sensitivity, how to let go of self-defeating behaviors, and how to focus energy on meeting each partners' needs.
With Getting the Love You Want couples in any stage of a relationship can resolve their conflicts and achieve mutual emotional satisfaction.
The Sexually Confident Wife: Connecting with Your Husband Mind Body Heart Spirit
by Shannon Ethridge
from Broadway
Maximize the sexual and emotional potential in your marriage! With down-to-earth wisdom based on the experiences of the thousands of women she’s counseled, Shannon Ethridge–author of the million-plus-selling Every Woman’s Battle series–shows women how to create the healthy, exhilarating sex lives they (and their husbands) desire.
Every woman deserves to enjoy great sex with her husband, without inhibition or shame. But many wives live with the burden of self-doubt or feel mystified about what men really want in bed. Others wrestle with memories of sexual abuse or neglect, guilt over past intimate relationships, or negative feelings about their own bodies. Maybe you’ve been thinking you were alone in your struggle to discover sexual fulfillment. Think again:
only 8 percent of married women consider their sex life “very hot”
21 percent call their sex life “routine and boring”
Another 21 percent ask, “What sex life?”
These sorry statistics don’t have to be your case, as Shannon Ethridge readily explains with arresting warmth and honesty. Brimming with confidence-boosting techniques and inspiring personal stories of rejuvenated relationships, The Sexually Confident Wife opens a new world of passion for every couple, helping women to connect with their men on every level–physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual–enabling them to fully enjoy the ultimate, enduring union that marriage can be.
The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed
by Mystery
from St. Martin's Press
His tips include:
*Give more attention to her less attractive friend at first, so your target will get jealous and try to win your attention.
*Always approach a target within 3 seconds of noticing her. If a woman senses your hesitation, her perception of your value will be lower.
*Don't be picky. Approach as many groups of people in a bar as you can and entertain them with fun conversation. As you move about the room, positive perception of you will grow. Now it's easy to meet anyone you want.
*Smile. Guys who don't get laid, don't smile.
Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl-A Woman's Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship
by Sherry Argov
from Adams Media
Do you feel like you are too nice?
Sherry ArgovÂ’s Why Men Love Bitches delivers a unique perspective as to why men are attracted to a strong woman who stands up for herself. With saucy detail on every page, this no-nonsense guide reveals why a strong woman is much more desirable than a "yes woman" who routinely sacrifices herself. The author provides compelling answers to the tough questions women often ask:
-Why are men so romantic in the beginning and why do they change?
-Why do men take nice girls for granted?
-Why does a man respect a woman when she stands up for herself?
Full of much-needed advice, hilarious real-life relationship scenarios, "she says/he thinks" tables, and the authorÂ’s unique "Attraction Principles," Why Men Love Bitches gives you bottom-line answers. It helps you know who you are, stand your ground, and relate to men on a whole new level. Once youÂ’ve discovered the feisty attitude men find so magnetic, youÂ’ll not only increase the romantic chemistry in the relationship-youÂ’ll gain your manÂ’s love and respect with far less effort.
Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex
by John Gray
from Harper Paperbacks
Relationship counselor John Gray focuses on the differences between men and women--men are from Mars, and women are from Venus, after all--and offers a simple solution: couples must acknowledge and accept these differences before they can develop happier relationships. In this unabridged version, Gray gives a spirited delivery of his message, especially when role-playing typical male/female interactions. Although it takes some time to adjust to his slightly nasal tone, the information is sound and gives both men and women helpful hints on improving themselves and their union. (Running time: 9.5 hours, 6 cassettes) --Sharon Griggins
Once upon a time Martians and Venusians met, fell in love, and had happy relationships together because they respected and accepted their differences. Then they came to Earth and amnesia set in: they forgot they were from different planets.
Based on years of successful counseling of couples and individuals, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus has helped millions of couples transform their relationships. Now viewed as a modern classic, this phenomenal book has helped men and women realize how different they really are and how to communicate their needs in such a way that conflict doesn't arise and intimacy is given every chance to grow.
The Complete Idiot's Guide to Amazing Sex, Third Edition
by Sari Locker
from Alpha
Sexy is as sexy does, according to Sari Locker (called "our favorite tantalizing sex writer" by Playboy magazine). But how to feel sexy if you're a virgin, or if you've experienced sexual problems, or have serious body image hang-ups? The Complete Idiot's Guide to Amazing Sex succeeds in not only teaching technique (as well as a book can), but also offers serious advice for boosting your self-esteem. As with other Complete Idiot guides, you'll probably want to turn this one backwards in your bookcase, or at least get a book cover for it. But get past the silly title and you'll find a plethora of facts, tips, and tricks on topics including sexual response, masturbation, foreplay, afterplay, oral sex, fantasy, sex toys, sexual preference, cross-dressing, and "The Big Om": tantric sex.
The margin notes liberally decorating the book are worth a hearty chuckle. The "Sextistics" are particularly fun and eye-opening. Some examples: only 9 percent of people surveyed believe sex appeal is innate; the rest feel it can be acquired!; about 7 percent of women have never climaxed; the majority of male crossdressers are married with children; and, according to the Hite Report, nearly 60 percent of men ages 61 to 75 said their desire for sex remained steady or increased with age, Viagra or no.
Locker, a sex educator and WCBS-TV relationship correspondent, has been a sex educator for more than a decade. That said, she should have placed the facts on contraceptives and sexually transmitted diseases earlier in the book, before the hot and heavy photographs of sexual positions. That gripe aside, Amazing Sex is worth investigating by both sexual neophytes and experienced couples looking to maintain a state of hot monogamy.
Most people know that there’s more to sex than the missionary position. But to make sex really hot, some people need a little guidance. That’s where acclaimed sex educator—and WCBS-TV relationship correspondent—Sari Locker steps in. The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Amazing Sex, Third Edition, has fresh advice on how readers can make smart sexual choices, cast aside inhibitions, and keep their sex life exciting well into their golden years. Readers get new and updated chapters on:
• Current sexual trends and attitudes
• Sex within marriage and long-term relationships
• Body image, obesity, and plastic surgery and their effect on sexuality
• Exciting techniques for reaching multiple orgasms for men and women
• Tips on specific sexual activities, including playful ideas on locations and toys
• Plus an 8-page full-color photographic insert of Sari’s eight original sexual positions
The Heart of the Five Love Languages
by Gary Chapman
from Northfield Publishing
People express and receive love in different ways. Dr. Gary Chapman identifies these as the five languages of love: Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. If you express love toward others in a way they don't understand, they will not realize you've expressed your love at all. The problem is that you're speaking different languages. Abridged version of the New York Times bestselling title.
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